~ D Day Has Been Successful!!! Love Has WON!~

Aw my friend, there is no other feeling of peace and joy than that which was explained above.  My heart is light, my shoulders relaxed and Im smiling everyday.    Its beautiful in this place and once you get there you will see how fast and furious it spreads.  WIldFIre baby!!!!

 

Dear guest,

 

I'm not sure if people necessarily find me interesting, but I intrigue myself with the fact that I have been on both sides of the aisle and I wish to share it with you, and maybe others, just in case it's a useful perspective. It's basically my life story for the last three years, so it could be completely long-winded, but I don't like providing "advice" without justifying the long path it took me to feel safe in offering that advice. I'll sum up my ideas and provide my story anyway if you feel like investigating it.

 

To be fair, part of the reason I decided to write allll this is because this is how I vowed I would help with ascension during Sunday's meditation. I've always wanted to "be there" for people, and my "intelligence" has always resided in areas that can't be tested. I think the others that have responded have just got caught up in their own experiences, even if you don't believe they are true. Fortunately for them, they probably don't remember too well what it's like to be on the non-spiritual side of the aisle, if they have ever even been there.

 

So here's my advice:

 

Meditate as you already do. DO NOT expect anything from meditation. Instead, go with meditation.

 

DO NOT compare yourself with others. I went to meditation retreat and now I can feel energy in my third eye, but I can't "use" my third eye, even though I read about all of the amazing things it can apparently do. I just accept the energy and feel what it does, not expecting from it even though I would like to.

 

If you read my story, do not compare yourself with it. Instead, think about your story. What caused you to start meditating? We all often want more than we currently have. If it's not money, it's knowledge or insight or love. But accept where you are instead and go with the journey.

 

Love as much as you can, because it is better than the reality you're referring to. You won't be able to love all of the time. Accept that and don't get bothered by it. Love is difficult in this world. The smallest amount is the most important.

 

Even if we are all imagining this stuff and it is not real, our imagining it has made at least some of it real, or this site and this post wouldn't be here. And that realness-by-definition should be acknowledged, appreciated, and accepted into "reality". Our delusion is better than the clear vision you imply everyone else has, and this delusion is not harming anyone, least of all ourselves. But if you're not "deluded" to the same degree as us, don't let that bother you either. ;-)

 

Just accept where you are while always striving to be positive. That is all that will help you. If you don't understand the author's experience, or my experience, then our experiences don't matter with respect to where you are. Strive to understand your experience and see if it grows.

 

If you hope it grows without pushing it to, it probably will.

 

———

 

Three years ago I was a hard-headed, logic-loving atheist. The Bible was the most annoying, ludicrous thing ever, Jesus "might probably have been real" but wasn't the son of God, and God? What's that?

 

Two years ago I sort of spontaneously had a vitamin B12 deficiency that kept me from getting to sleep, which led me to being very tired, which kept me from writing a novel I had really wanted to write during this time.

 

My doctor prescribed ambien for four nights. Surprise, the day of the last dosage was the worst day of my 21 year old life. It was deep, deep depression. Here I was moping around, then this "medicine" completely killed my inner self. I called out for help, to the gods I didn't believe in. A couple hours later I got a random call from the college where I had stayed months earlier over the summer for my time at the West Virginia  Governor's Honors Academy.

 

My plan had been simply to write, which I was too tired to do, so I was not considering college for that reason and for some others. This call changed that. My doctor finally noticed my low B12 levels and after a few months of supplements I could sleep again.

 

A year later, just one year ago, I was in college. I was feeling pretty good about my months-long recovery but I was still anxious and I did not realize how low my self esteem still was. Adjusting was hard. (I'd end up moving off campus after 4 months just to escape the obnoxious noise and environment of the dorms.)

 

Since I didn't realize how bad off I still was inside, I clung to love. "Love." Love! Not of myself, but of someone that could complete me. Love on the outside.

 

I found this person a month after starting college, but, he didn't find me back. It was totally one-way. It was my delusion, and I wallowed in it for four months. I felt I needed his love to survive, but he was not giving it, and he shouldn't have. This was my problem.

 

Very very slowly I realized he would not budge, that it couldn't work out, that I had to do something with myself because I just couldn't bear what I was feeling. Buddhism had always been interesting to me, a "logical" religion among the many crazier ones, but I never looked into it seriously. I started to do that.

 

I started meditating in a very simple manner, counting my breaths with my fingers. I wrapped my logical mind around things like interdependence and the Four Noble Truths. This was, logically, beautiful. What took me so long!?

 

This last June I attended a 10-day Goenka meditation retreat.

 

That changed everything. It switched me to the other side, "this" side.

 

Why? Because since the last two days of that retreat I've had energy coursing through my forehead in the "third eye" area. It is undeniable; I can't ignore it, just sometimes forget it's there. I've felt it every day, and science has not explained this.

 

But I researched more and more into possible explanations and kept coming across more and more places like this website, some "crazier", some less dubious.

 

But as crazy as they seemed to my old logical way of viewing things, they actually made sense. My third eye was opening? I have a third eye? There are six other body chakras? People can feel this energy everywhere? People can manipulate this energy?

 

By accepting one chakra I accepted all 7. If I accepted those, than I had to accept that they were connected to a bigger world hidden from us in some way. So I had to accept the idea of beyond-physical energy, and thus beings, and this acceptance led me to a new understanding of "God". The Bible is still mostly nonsense as far as I'm concerned, but Jesus the Crhist lived, just as Gautama the Buddha transcended.

 

And if I accept all of that, then why wouldn't I accept that "ascension" is occurring? I came across the concept only within the last three months. At first I still did not believe it and even though all this stuff is fascinating to read, providing many great "What Ifs", I was still doubtful.

 

Then this Thursday I just suddenly felt so positive. Inexplicably positive. I was listening to some favorite, moving, so-very-human music in my collection and I just laid back and felt the subtle happiness — 'love' — that was overcoming me. I did not plan this. For what it's worth it happened two days before the 3-day period of light that just passed, which opened with the meditation that just occurred two nights ago. (Or did the 3-day period culminate with it? I got the timeframe confused.)

 

I meditated too. I DID NOT experience any life-changing vision or feelings. However, I did feel a couple total-body-shivers that overcame me, which I read someone else describe too. At a certain level I wish I had experienced more, like the author.

 

At another level I accept that I can feel only what I have felt, that I must be at one with it, go with it, and that I should calmly see where it goes with me. This is the 'training' I got at the meditation retreat. In retrospect, I acquired a new way of viewing the world along with a new undeniable, physical feeling within myself, and these both helped me greatly. Calmness I was expecting. Spirituality I was not.

 

Knowing just that much from experience, I can now see how other people can be "more advanced" than me in this spiritual stuff. I did not experience what the author did, but at a very logical level I understand that they most likely experienced what they say they have.

 

Have I? No. Can others? I believe so. I hope so.

 

I have looked at this "reality" for what feels like a long time, even though I'm just 21. I have —NEVER— liked it. It frequently disgusts me. Over the last couple years I've accepted the fact that I'm a very emotional guy, but it's very lonely over here in sensitive-land.

 

In the last year or so I have learned to live with that disgust and to focus on the positive/wholesome in spit of the opposite being everywhere too. I would focus on love instead of disgust. If I could focus on disgust so easily, and that hurt me, then why shouldn't I just focus on love, to try to feel good?

 

In the last couple months I have learned that what I've always wished for is, apparently, happening. Very soon, humanity will be Humanity, no longer an animalistic, fighting group of people that just don't see what's around them.

 

A certain part of me accepts it could all be a very big hoax, and I accept that feeling. But I also know I am now totally invested in "ascension" because what it promises on the other side is exactly what I have yearned for for years — love, cooperation, understanding, peace, inner beauty… 

 

I haven't always lived those things, but I have always felt them. Why should I be the only one? For once I'm being told that I'm not, and I believe that.

 

 

 

The music I'm referring to are songs like 'Baba Yetu' and 'God Yu Tekkem Laef Blong Mi (Hans Zimmer), both of which you can find on YouTube. I would describe it as African music in an American-harmonic style.