God said:
There are times when you would rather be alone than in the presence of anyone else. There are times when you feel hampered or held back by the presence of even friends. There are times when others break your train of thought or seem to impose upon your life just by being there.
On the other hand, when you feel all alone and don’t want to be, you may feel forlorn and unloved. You may not even know whose companionship you want and, yet you know you are without it. You are certain that you are supposed to have it. Something is missing from your life that should be here for you. Sometimes you feel like the loneliest person in the world.
Sometimes you may feel that I, God, am a poor substitute for a live person beside you. You may crave My Presence, yet you want Me to take the initiative. You would like Me to loom large favorably in your life and make Myself known. You hesitate. Sometimes I don’t feel real to you. To you, I am far away, other-worldly, perhaps not really here.
What happens in life sometimes is that you want to sulk alone and ponder all the wishes you have all in a row, wishes that are not fulfilled and that you may have decided to keep at bay. And so you want and don’t want at the same time. You push and pull, pull and push. You bemoan the loss of what you push away. You might like to evade heartbreak at any cost.