ascension

THIS COULD BE THE MOST IMPORTANT, ENLIGHTENING,  LIFE-CHANGING EVENT IN YOUR LIFE !!     Have you ever wondered what 2012 is really about? Are we alone in the universe? Is the Earth Hollow? Why is Area 51 restricted from the public?  What goes on there, and what was Colonel Woodard’s job several floors below the surface of Area 51?   What will happen Dec.21?  Have you heard of the new money exchange and prosperity funds? Do you ever wonder how life will be in the new dimensions?

DEEPLY AWAKE – EARTH'S HISTORY

THERE IS AN URGENCY WITH WHICH I AM BEING TOLD TO GET THIS OUT. PLEASE FORGIVE THE PLENTIFUL TYPOS

Do you remember the first time you heard the idea that the opposite of love is not fear, not hate, but indifference?

Quite a liberating thought. The opposite of love. Isn't indifference the heavy-lidded shaman who dances and prays and intuits for the tribe, so supported by mystery that there can be no other response to all extremity within mankind, except for a nod, a slow grin, a quiet heart. And is that stillness indifference, or unspeakably profound love?

Unless you are in the presence of it, it is hard to know which you are seeing demonstrated. Indifference and acceptance, they both may appear as inertia, as unmatched strength, as deep humility or unending devotion. The way the room lights up when you are in the presence of it, that's the only way to know. Actions, and words, can be deceiving.

'I am a meat eater!' my son boldly exclaimed at the table, hefting a spoon full of taco meat into his mouth with gusto.

I nodded as I put the wasabi on my sushi and lifted it to my mouth. I felt peace. Why? This was the first time I made something for him that I did not partake in myself. I couldn't. I didn't want his favorite, taco meat. 

The desire not to eat meat is part of the Ascension Process. For the past six months, I have been experiencing it. But out of simple economics of feeding the family, I have had to 'keep the peace' so to speak, and make what 'everybody wants'. When it would come time to go out to dinner, it would be impossible to agree where to go. I want mexican! one would say. And my stomach would churn at the thought of yet another bean and cheese burrito, with all the fat and all the salt and nothing fresh. Let's go to Souplantation! I would counter back. Sometimes it would work, and sometimes it wouldn't.

Remember you are family first, and everyone's 'Ascension Symptoms' might be at a different 'rate' or 'degree' at the moment
honor your family by making the healthiest choices--grass-fed lean beef, organic free-range chicken, 'happy eggs' that are from hens who are not caged. Add vegetables! Last night was guacamole with onion, garlic, and tomato made fresh by me.

Trust that everyone is on the right path for them

DEEPLY AWAKE – GOD BLESS LEONARD COHEN

ANTHEM

The birds, they sang

at break of day.

Start again,

I heard them say.

Don't dwell on what has

passed away,

or what has yet to be.

Oh, the wars,

they will be fought again.

The holy dove,

she will be caught again,

and bought and sold

and bought again;

The dove is never free.

Ring the bells that still can ring

Forget your perfect offering

DEEPLY AWAKE – HERE

I must finish my thought. I have been in a wonderful place all day, into the night, contemplating, holding, exploring, loving such a great light, loosely translated in the way the snow is falling, the woody smell of coffee hanging like a cloud in this little home, the way my nightgown now hangs off my body.

I've been a shuffling magician today, an American gandhi, a bestower of blessing and hope. Everything has felt so golden today, so singularly beautiful, so mysterious. So deep runs my river now. So calm lies the body of my true love. So serene do the objects glow within my field.

I awoke today with the thoughts with which I wish to put myself to sleep.

This morning I was told, understood, breathed into and breathed from an understanding which came once the body flush had passed. I saw me as a big being, a tall being, living on the upper floors of a very large home. I realized that the me who works as a nurse, who struggles to find peace with her family, who stumbles and falls and is in debt and can't seem to keep her house tidy, she has taken refuge with the bigger me for many months. She has let things go, caught up in ecstasy and understanding, remaining, for all these months so deeply awake.

DEEPLY AWAKE – HOME

I write this next part with a shakiness within. With uncanny reverence and customary humor. I wrote on and on and on as it was happening, and review my field notes rarely. I have felt an invitation to discuss it. It is a mystical event, one I find sacred. Ridiculous. Holy. Only the insanely blessed can make fun of themselves to this degree.

I had, since waking up in January, felt as if there was a wall of light constructed past May 25, 2012. It seemed there was an impenetrable barrier, one which did not yield to the darkest threats, the meanest epithets, the most pitiful begging. It was just there. A lighted koan. A big question mark.

I did not know what my life would look like on May 26. In fact, I lived from January to May not really believing there would be anything at all that I would recognize on the 26th. I sensed a surprise.

By the 23rd of May, I was in a panic. It is one thing to consider that it might all be over on a certain date in the future. We all live with our expiration dates stamped on everything we produce, while living in the world of days and nights, good and bad, up and down. It is quite another to be two days away from some made up deadline, unconvinced I will be, once the calendar page flips and the day arrives.

I went to a friend who works as a guide and psychic. I go to her when my mechanical life is so intensely messed up that I come to the standstill of paralysis. She lifted me out of my fear. She told me I was perhaps pushing myself too hard. She gave me solace, encouragement, and the fear found surcease. I woke up on the 25th unafraid and expectant.

DEEPLY AWAKE – THE TRINITY

Imagine you are looking upon a scene from another age, somewhere out of time. There is a long, narrow and impossibly tall outdoor hallway, corridor. The passage is dark, and leads to an arena.

In the arena is a tiger, as ravenous and unpredictable as they come, maybe rabid, maybe brain injured, but nothing to sneeze at.

The passage leads to something good, but you have never been told the specifics. You just found yourself at the mouth of this arena, in a darkened corridor, with a cardboard sword in your hand, and some kind of innate understanding that you are to stay at the mouth of this corridor, with your inadequate little sword, facing apparent daily annihilation, with absolutely no clue what is really going on.

Now imagine that the person holding that Weapon of No Consequence is eight years old. There are many things that escape an eight year old, through no fault of their own. An eight year old is unequipped to command authority, not because s/he is weak, but because s/he does not have capacity for the mechanics of blade and flesh, shade and sun, fear and fearlessness.

The child succumbs to the madness inherent in finding oneself in an impossible situation. Outgunned, unskilled, frightened,threatened, uncertain.

When I saw this in meditation, I understood that this poor abandoned soul is my ego.

The part of myself who has had to guard me as I slept. She kept the tiger at bay. Sometimes she would bellow at the tiger, red in the face, taunting it, knowing full well that the tiger would not, could not pounce, but knowing that just one swipe from that great paw was enough to finish her. She yells, “Bring it on, you twisted creature. Come over here and I'll let you have it!” When threat passes, the little girl crumples against the concrete wall, too shaken to stir. But the vigil goes on. It goes on today, within each of us.

DEEPLY AWAKE – RIDDLE

Do you like riddles? Do you remember the first time you heard the Riddle of the Sphinx? Riddles have always struck me as a bit dangerous, an elder taunting his student, displaying higher knowledge in the common man's tongue, confounding an intricate mind with pure simplicity. They are mysterious, deep, and speak to ancient, withheld, earned knowledge.

Such it is with daily life for me now.

Daily I am given two, three, sometimes more punchlines, solutions, connections and significances. I can think of no better word, significance.

And the thing is, all of this is going on behind a plain, sort of frumpy exterior, a simple woman living beyond her means, her means having become alarmingly scarce. Monumental truths being revealed to a beggar. The Universe breathes deeply once again, on inhale, all is in macrocosm, on exhale, micro. In and out, expanding and contracting, communicating always, inferring constantly, revealing at will. Whose will is always in question.

I perceive this hushed breathing now, have for a few hours. I think of my littlemind's life. I remember the truth. I get stuck on a physical problem requiring resolution. I am awed by another notion, my heart expands, my body flushes, I feel the presence of my family, I swim away again, to nearly drown again, in that sea of misinterpretation and silence, silently mourning that no one comes to my rescue, realizing only in meditation I never make a sound when in extremity.

I have come to understand that most of the isolation I felt this lifetime was because I went unrecognized. The part of me which feeds the whole operation, the coal pit in me, it kept lurching through, year after year, never getting a delivery, mining instead my blood and bones for the fuel to keep this whole operation afloat.